Just a Thought

Every day as soon as I begin to shut my system off, start romancing the bed & bliss, I begin to worry. An uneasiness about the bigwig of my life 'Tomorrow'.

Out of every thing that can be defined, there is one thought on my mind. You can call it a wish. Can I order that one wish of mine to any of the angel . 

Can I ask for a morning tomorrow with people around me with absolutely no Identity; just a wish. Can I ask for a morning tomorrow, which is full of people I have never known; spare a thought. Can I wake up to that morning and conquer the world full of faces that I've never seen; a hope may be. Or can someone let me hide myself beneath the blanket until my face is forgotten . I always wonder if I can ever breath air into that one wish of mine. 

When you ask me why, that becomes quite complicated to answer. One which may not convince you, but makes extreme sense to me, my thinking capabilities and my skill of understanding self. 

• When there isn't a past between me and you, that is a kind of freedom. I can actually speak anything and everything on my mind. 
• Gives me freedom of ego. Mine is a pristine one. 
• Do not have to keep in mind our last conversation before I start to speak, In short I don't have to censor myself. 
• No one expects anything out of a new chap . So here I"m without out any pressure of expectations and pleasure running the way I like & the way I want .   
• I can be self. Not a puppet of someone else's likes and dislikes. Just because I don't have to impress anyone. 
• Do not have to play on emotions and let someone play on them either . 
• Just because I don't know you, I can address the way I want .
• There is nothing but open mind when you are judging me and vice verse. 
• Mistakes once done will no longer mean anything in branding myself . There is always a chance of a new me. And no one ever knows any of them.
• I'll not be a bouncing ball, bouncing back into things that hurt or rather the ones that haunt me.
• I can respect myself lot better. 
• No regrets . I can always do things with new people which I wished to do with you today
• Finally do not have to feel bad when I ping someone and don't get a reply back. Because you'll be the one I knew for one day . Seriously I wish you were. 

You may say being an amnesia patient is better, forgetting everything as soon as you get up. But that doesn't give freedom of knowing self which is extremely paramount, at least to me.

Just imagine.... "Just a new day when ever I wake up...Wow it sounds Piquant."

Sakethursforever : )

How can I Say you're not the ONE

How can I blame that lovely dove,
who failed to deliver my heap of love.  

I sent you a phrase of words and sign,
the intent was lost somewhere on the line .

I asked the flowers to send you an elegant puff,
the essence were lost somewhere with the huff.

I urged the sand on the river bank,
just when waves have left them blank. 

The mail was the letter of what I feel, 
the text diminished the amount of zeal. 

I told the butterflies, you are the bliss,
they almost gave you a distant miss .

I delivered a note of what it is,
you saw it like a jumbled quiz. 

I put my pain on a plane of mine,
your radar screen was far too plain. 

I wrote it on the gust of air,
the wind spattered it here and there. 

I sang a song to tell a truth,
the theme was lost in the band of sound. 

Though the tune is not the same,
lyrics always meant the same. 

Fortunes always flung far away,
but you were always on my way.


You ask me who was the one on mind,
You ask me who is one who's lined.
You ask me where do I send this to,
You ask me who's not there all through.
You ask me who is the desired one,
.
.
.
How can I say you'er not the one. 

Sakethursforever : )

That Wonderful Buddy

It was when I met him for the first time. He seemed to me like a car dead still, parked at the lay by on a busy highway. With speedy cars racing on, he was silent, confused, disorganized and never seemed to belong on the tough road (going by his standards). Everything he looked at seemed tall. What I liked going with this young kid was that he has always learnt to drive on his own capabilities and did things which were just enough for his survival on the long road ahead. As he started to learn, the tallest things became taller and taller things seemed tall.

He always though he was a rare find on the highway. I said rare because he never had any extraordinary adjectives attached to his work or character and he was pretty simple & basic. And don't you think being a normal chap is rather unusual these days. He never planned his journey beyond the visible curve and just got along with ease as he passed the milestones. As I told you he learnt just enough to drive through the road ahead. Not a notch more, not a notch less.

Amazing quality of his, that I would personally love to download into my system is his ability to have an opinion on everything he comes across as he drives through. He has a typical though process of his own and that is something he is very proud of. Not many times can something influence his though process. All the time it just like what it has to be. He hasn't told me any of this, but One can read it on the things he do. He loves being a decision maker even when count of his decisions being right is five out of ten. I sense he plays a little gamble before making decisions. Sometimes he is also fickle, but he loves changing the decision just like the winds .

He is very specific in likes he own, the choices he make. He once told me, if you make a list of likes for 5 individuals in a room, the list would be distinct. Just like finger print, retina scanner, people can also be identified based on their likes and probably dislikes too. But the problem here unlike the bio metric system is that the likes and dislikes are dynamic which keep changing. Anyway when he likes something, he likes it to the fullest. None can match him on the scales of liking, or probably loving that particular instance.

He hates changes that take place around him even when they are inevitable. Be it the road he is travelling, car he's driving or the companions he accumulate and relations which he develops with them. He has an unique nature of getting into a emotional relation with almost everything he comes across. People, Seasons, things like pens, Coins; the list doesn't have a particular genre. He loves his likes more than anything else . It would be lucky for anyone to be his most favorite because it is a privilege. And believe me I'm not exaggerating. I would love to be a pen that he likes, just because that is nothing short of getting treated like a princess.

My friend, if I can call him so, is  as old as I am on the road we are driving. He has taken over me many times and I did the same quite often. Everything that we come across leaves an impression on us . And this guy left more than an impression on my lifestyle in all these years that we have been together.

He inspired me mutually, he put me under pressure constantly, he dominated me unknowingly, he drove me emotionally, influenced me mentally and partnered me physically. Most of my system which is walking around, thinking, doing things and breathing is mostly influenced by that wonderful gentleman I ever met.

On the eve of his Birthday, He's me wishing him a spectacular B'Day. Let me tell you, you have been an alluring friend of mine.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY 'SOUL'

Sakethursforever : )

You are the one who deserves all that

A Vow exists, that I never shared,
An Oath survived, that I never declared .

Always safe inside myself,
That phrase was a promise all by itself.

Always secured was my will,
Trying hard not to out spill.

Those lines were always under the mask,
Delivering them is not my task.

Someone said words had power,
Just enough, to stall a rapid river.

Wanting to flow off the brimming heart,
Longing to flood the distance apart .

I bar them on my mind sometimes,
I cover them up in my voice sometimes.

They make their way out of my lips,
And get away like some unheard scripts .

They knock me out of the sleep sometimes,
They wrack me into a dream sometimes.

Read them on the things I do, Read them on the words I do.
Read them on the way I'm, Read them on the tune I hum.
Read them on the likes I own, Read them on the enmity I hold.
Read them on the tranquil around, Read them on my eloquent eyes.


Wish you are the who, who reads all that.
Wish it is you, who need all that.
Hope I don't have to say all that. 
Hope you know that lovely that. 

Coz,
You are the one who deserves all that .


sakethursforever : )

Straight out of my thoughts...

Take me there, where I can breath some air,
and find a smile that can be my pair. 
Take me through to a lovely dawn,
where smile is the only suit to don. 

Get me a cloud of immense rain,
which ships our every drop of pain.
Get me a mask of glee to wear,
and drop the bleak somewhere down the stair. 

Drive me through the gate of fate,
with no limits on my freight. 
Drive me past the cries on the way,
leaving behind everything in grey.

Gift me a beam of flashy light,
I would use it through the gloomy night.
Gift me a hefty share of luck,
to force me out of the place I'm stuck. 

Let me run an extra mile,
to see my woe whacked under the nail.
Let me learn the rhyme of happy chime,
let me learn the theme of time. 

Guide me out of the clumsy cage,
to play my role on the center stage.
Guide my thoughts to a greater height, 
and let me sense a sharpened sight .

Help me find a soul in me.
Help me find a soul for me.
Help me find a hand to hold.
Whenever the time is cold. 

Find a smile that can be my pair....Find a smile that can be my pair....

Sakethursforever : )

A Fantasy - A Delusion

"M.E LECTURE HALL 2", the board read on the first floor inside the old PG building. Bench 2 & 3, Row 1 were we four, with least possibility of recollection anything else other than the work at hand. Sushma was busy solving WILSON  θ  method for dynamic analysis and Shiva was trying hard to find a way out of the differential equations that kept flowing over 4 pages all together. Adityan doing what he is best at, preparing last minute study material and I employed my very small mind into CRANK NICOLSON method . Sound of pencil lead rubbing against the paper, loose papers, texts full of foreign names, different kinds of symbols, note books, rhythm of pen getting tapped on bench and few lays packets coexisted with us. Window was flattering to the far right and tube light flicking (standing up to its name & reputation) . Newton's first law worked with many other domains not just science. We remained in the state of " Student before Exam " mode until there was an external force that acted on us. Those familiar audio waves students are often treated with. Something vibrating on the metal desk making hollow sound. All of a sudden everyone were back to living senses. It was as though we were kidnapped by someone and just got released. It took me a while to realize, that was my mobile vibrating beneath. Shiva gently pushed his books aside deciding to take a break, sushma took out her side dish to munch, Adityan started explore his all new Blackberry.  

Typing in the mobile passkey 97325, I logged onto Whats App. There was only one message and it instantly brought a dab smile that ran across my cheek. I've forgotten all the derivations done till then and that one line on the mobile screen seat ejected me out of library mode into a virtual hill station. The other three went into some discussion already and I was searching for a song on my mobile. Linked the song "TUM HO THO" from Rock on  and quickly put my thumb finger on the send button. The chat log for the day read Diya's name with a message "I LOVE YOU" and a MP3 file which was my reply. My mobile kept silent for a while and then the screen started to glow. Soon a picture came up, it was She with a cute smile sitting on my bike and giving a charming pose. Quickly I respond the call and walked out of the room for a brief talk. I returned back after few moments and everyone inside the room wore a fickle smile on their face. We bundled up all our derivations after an hour and we started to leave. On my way back, my bike rode straight to her place. We shared the Bournville I brought for her, went on a prolonged stroll, had a long chat and delightful panipuri. It was time to head home and complete the remaining part of derivation. As I put my bike key into the holder, she asked me to call her once I reached home and told me a beautiful BYE; to which my reaction was an affirmative smile. 

I got back home, locked my bike and dialed 9866...... just as she has asked me to do. Spoke about some random stuff for next 10 minutes and decided to meet her the next morning at jogger's path. She said BYE. Even before I said something she began to say in a despondent tone " You have not told bye in the evening too...".  Moments later I went back to her place . Gave a missed call on her mobile, a signal asking her to come out. I could see the surprised look on her face as she walked, out along with the excited expression which she always gives when we meet. With a confused tone she asked why I was there. 

I went closer to her,  looked straight into her eyes and said, " YOU KNOW WHAT...I CAN NEVER TELL A 'BYE' TO YOU DIYA...." .

We spent a couple of seconds without saying anything. She finally broke the silence and gave me an affable tap on my cheek. She then said, "YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU ARE REALLY VERY SWEET, SAKETH".

Lights were dim that evening, cool breeze, about to rain kind of climate and someone you love the most just said you were SWEET. Wow, I thought it was Life. There was another friendly pat now. Another one, this time a bit harder. The next one was almost a slap. Even before I realized the slap, I received one more on my shoulder. Then came faint voice .... Shiva called you thrice, Sushma is now calling you will you get up at least now......

You wake up this late and run away without having your breakfast she exclaimed...!!

Oh......

Umm...hmm...Good Morning AMMA I said....!!!

Later that evening in a very sarcastic tone, my mom told me to dream as early as 5 AM in the morning and to hope them come true.

Not at 9 .



Sakethursforever : )

I liked it.

Like every other 22 year old, Movies make an important chapter on my list of likes . It was a couple of months since I've seen a video shared on Facebook. A trailer it was. I thought it was promising. And here for the first time I write about a Movie I am thoroughly impressed with . 

"Madras Cafe"  11:00 PM show at a multiplex with a set of three friends who barely knew each other and I was the only common link or a mutual friend going by Facebook language. This will probably be first time with movies in my domain (post 1997), I would term a movie "DIFFERENT" . As a movie goer Yes, I've been treated with a different stuff. The feel that took over me is no different when compared to the gripping moments I went through while reading "Angels & Demons" or a "Dooms Day Conspiracy" .  

It will be a kind of social studies answer where in the first line of every response starts like this; " Something is because of the following reasons : 1,2,3.... ", Here are the reasons why I term Madras Cafe as one of the best  (at least in my domain).

The movie was made on a purpose, and every frame had that purpose expressed with a prudent tact. There wasn't a frame that was un-necessary, there isn't a character awkwardly poking his nose and most importantly each & every dialogue that is written has a point and weight . Screenplay was specific and so was the plot .  

I had never seen an Indian movie which could think beyond Pakistan when dealing about National Security (A movie that can be aired on 15th of August or on 26th of January).  May be for the first time though we've made an attempt in thinking beyond the limits which we imposed on self. 

Emotions play an important role in making a knock on ones mind. The movie has got certain high emotional sequences which are dealt with higher order realistic tinge.  There are scenes in the movie where in you feel Vikram's going to shout at peak of his voice, makes an belligerent challenge, delivers a lengthy patriotic phrase. He doesn't do all that, instead he simply mumbles a silent line which leaves you with tremors  perforating deep into your thinking capabilities .

John Abraham all these days was just an other lad on Indian Movies whom I had very little interest on . He is obviously the decision maker with this movie and each bit of it is spot on . He is the cynosure of the film. It was a strict NO with senseless display of erected muscles, adventurous fights, unwanted skin shows, stupid romance, sick songs which are presented on a very prestigious stage giving a tag, calling the movie commercial. Yet the movie created an impact which is still knocking on my thought process. There were moments when every cell in my brain said the hero's gonna shout or make aggressive move. But then, every time he quietly says a thoughtful dialogues. John will surely leave you with a long lasting thump of a superlative degree.

One reason I love reading DAN BROWN is because of the informative stuff he puts into his books. Madras Cafe does exactly the same. It is very informative. Dealing with technicalities, portraying the civil war, events that led to the odd things and the after effects also . 

Look out for Race against Time thriller mode in the second half, Unfolding of the assassination plot and most importantly the Decoding of intercepts . Personally to me, the perfect mix of Hindi-English dialogues expressing a tense feel at key moments was the best part . Madras Cafe may surely be a routine reel on Star Movies. It is certainly a very fresh one Star Gold.

There's a line in the movie a journalist says, " Har Kisi ka apna sach hotha hai, depends tum kaha khade ho...." . You will love the movie if you are at the right position I would say. 

Post Script : "I'm Impressed." It is as good as any movie made in west on a similar scale, if not better then it. 

sakethursforever : )